angels dont give up on me today

You know how some people say things without knowing that what they say can actually hurt someone's feelings? Someone used to do that a lot to my parents. Now she's gone & I feel terrible. I avoided her & now that she's gone I can no longer visit her or even apologize for doing what I did. But maybe if she was nicer, things wouldn't have ended up that way. Or maybe it was my fault. The thing that's making me regret so much was when she said we would never visit her on Hari Raya. Yeap, we didn't. We could have but we didn't. I wanted to blame someone for that but I can only think of myself to blame. I'm starting to realize that I do take people for granted. I never appreciate things people do for me & it never crossed my mind they would go without saying goodbye. When will I ever learn? 

Sammy was run over by a cab 2 hours ago & is injured badly right now. I'm just afraid that he won't be able to survive because the last one couldn't. This time round, alhamdulillah, it is still able to look me in the eye & gave me the assurance that he can still make it. Sammy's a really strong cat. It did made me wanna cry seeing him not being able to walk properly. He even rested his head on my legs because he was so weak & he just needed the rest. This isn't the time for you to leave me, Sammy. You did it again. You walked away. Like the last time. I'm very disappointed in you. These cats mean the world to me. I don't like what you're doing to them. What the hell is wrong with you?

Can't count on you most of all when I really need it It's the simple things that you do really hurt my feelings The more I try, the more I'm starting to see it This can't work anymore, than you believe it Goodbye may come as a shock Even though I love you a lot I've given every breath I've got Sometimes you gotta break down and breathe Add how many times I gave my heart To how many times we fell apart And it equals A promise in the dark So don't promise me Add how many times I gave you me Divided by so many memories And it equals A promise in the dark So don't promise me Listen... I just don't know what the problem is, what the deal is Was I there too much, did I move too fast, I couldn't see it? All these promises are probably how you deal with it I'm tired of hearing you say your innocent Don't think I forgot Because I really didn't, who cares if you're lying or not I've given every breath I've got Sometimes you gotta br...

"Andai dia bukan milikku di dunia, Tuhan temukan aku dengan insan yang seperti dia Kenangan kita terlalu indah Tuhan tabahkan hatiku untuk melepaskannya Bila nanti aku harus pergi Usah engkau tangisi, usah engkau merindu Aku berjanji engkau akan temui Insan yang jauh lebih baik dariku Kini aku pergi, jauh membawa cinta Yang nyata sudah tiada"

I swear I was doing okay without you. Yes, at times, you do cross my mind. But that's about it. I don't try to talk to you & I don't even stalk you anymore. I'd be lying if I were to say that I don't miss you because I do. So bad that it hurts. The past few months has been fine. There were times I died a little inside at the mention of your name or just the thought of you. Other than that, I was just fine on my own. And you, doing what you do best, just keep appearing asking me how I was doing & things like that. If I could, I would tell you that I was miserable for months. I pushed everyone aside for you. Every guy was compared to you. & no matter how badly you've hurt me, I would still choose you over anyone else. Don't you get it? I will take you back no matter what. So in order for me not to do that, you have got to stop being nice to me. You have no idea how excited I get whenever you text me randomly. Or how I smile at your texts. Are you c...